Monday, September 28, 2009

She's Out There, And She's Lovin' Every Minute Of It!

Thanks to the whole super-fun tonsil thing, Sophs got a bit of a late start with preschool. But now she has joined her class and has a full week's worth of education under her belt. Which means I have a full week's worth of hilarious Sophie-isms to share with you guys. (I warn you. Put down your beverage and void your mouth of any tic-tacs. Your monitor will thank you.)

I'm sure it surprises you all to learn that Sophie wasn't one.bit.timid about breaking away from mom and taking on a new challenge. On the drive to her school the first day, she was about to burst with excitement. When we got to her room, she signed her name on the sign-in sheet, hung her back-pack on her hook, picked up her name badge and walked over to start work at one of the centers. I said, "Oh...okay, Sophs. I'll see you later!" She ran over to (I thought) give me a hug, but instead she motioned for me to lean down. When she was sure she had my full attention, she said, "Listen, mom. Take care of Puppy and be gentle with him. He doesn't like it when you fling him around."

In the car after preschool, Sophie was going on and on about the class pets (two geckos named George and Gracie), the songs, the Vanilla Wafers snack, the kid with the "purple eye from running into the doorknob", the gerbil that visited from Mrs. Somebody's class, the girl who wouldn't stop crying, the art project, the... I jumped in during a moment of breath-taking and said, "Fun! So, what did you learn about?" There was a giant pause and she said, "Um...God?" I asked her to be more specific. Big sigh and then, "...Whew, mom! That's a thinker!"

At home we ran into our neighbors outside. Sarah asked Sophie if she'd made any friends at school. Her response: "Yeah! Lots of 'em! ...And not even imaginary ones!!" (Snort.) Poor America, Ongonk, and Susanna. They've been replaced with friends that aren't invisible.

The next day when I picked her up, we had barely made it out to the car when she announced: "Hey, guess what? Nobody socked me in the stomach at recess, but a boy ate a booger! Right in front of the teacher!"

On Wednesday, Sophie had to take a photo of her family in for show-and-tell. She was supposed to "introduce" us to her class. I asked her what she was going to say. Her response (pointing to each person in the picture): "Well, I'm gonna say my dad's name is Russell and he's a nukey-lar engineer. I'm Sophie - the kid. That's my mom Kristy and she's a... well, I don't know really what she is - she does something at home with the laundry." ~That's as far as she got before my gigantic snort eruption distracted her.

Friday when we were walking to the car at least a dozen little pint-sized gentlemen yelled, "BYE, Sophie!" as we passed. But I noticed nary a girl even looked her direction. When we were buckled in, I asked her why she only talked about the boys in her class - did she ever play with any of the girls? She said (very seriously), "Okay, Mama, here's the deal. I don't hang out with the girls because they make grumpy faces at me. But the boys ALL LOVE ME. They love me so much it would just...blow your mind. See, that's why." I guess I looked a little stunned because she added, "It's okay. Boys are nice. They wanna marry you and stuff."

All righty then. That'll please your father.

And finally, to wrap up last week, Sophie received her first homework assignment. Mrs. Wardle handed me a piece of white posterboard, cut out in a gingerbread man-like form. On it were instructions asking us to help our child "make themselves". It went on to suggest that we "really try to capture his or her personality". (In 2-D form, mind you.) Sophs told me she wanted "herself" to have: a sparkly blue shirt, polka dot pants, "funny shoes", feathers and flowers, googly eyes, and a fuzzy pink boa. (I know you're all just shocked to learn she knew exactly what she wanted! Ahem.) So we drove to Hobby Lobby and I turned her loose in the craft aisle.

After we were finished - and covered in glue, Sophie stood back and said, "Well... I look kind of hideous. But I think it will make Brock laugh."

Oh, goody. One week in and we already seem to have taken the fleet of men and and narrowed it down to one specific crush. Serenity.


sarah p said...

oh my, oh my. only a week in and you've got SO much fun to share! she's going to love looking back on this one're smart to record it all here.

i still think that the "blow your mind" comment is my favorite.

i miss her. does she want to take some time off from preschool to visit jackson?

love you guys.

Russ said...

Only one thing to add: I am very concerned about Jeb's beautiful green eyes. It's also Jeb this and Jeb that. It may be time to talk with Jeb.

Jennie said...

Just when I think she can't get any cuter, she DOES! So glad you recorded these memories. Mainly because I enjoyed them so much, but I know how much she will love reading these some day!

Lisa said...

I also want to hear about Jeb's beautiful green eyes! Sound like there is no shortage of eligible bachelors at this preschool. The girl is beyond hilarious....and so cute and looking like a big girl in these pictures! We need to let the cousins catch up on their school adventures on the phone.

emily said...

She is so hilarious! I would watch a TV show with her as the main character...they can't write stuff as funny as what comes out of her mouth! I can't wait to read more about preschool. Keep the blog posts coming! I'm glad you're back at it!

Anonymous said...

Oh my, where do I begin... that child :)
I just love that you, do something with the laundry.. I just busted a gut on that one :0
And the boys...look out it doesn't get any better.. I loved boys at her age, too!! Uh-oh
Thanks for letting us "technology impaired" folks in on some of the fun.:) Please don't EVER leave us again.
Aunt Becky

Anonymous said...

What a great synopsis of an hilarious week with our little stand-up comedian!

Oh, by the way, Becky and Kerry thought Sophie's cardboard "persona" looked like something out of "Chuckie!" Love, Mooms

Kritter Krit said...

She didn't look like Chuckie until she added the googly eyes that she insisted upon. Up TO the googles, she looked like a sweet little girl with a toupee. But you know your Sophs, it's not about being cute - it's about being FUNNY. And she definitely accomplished that!! ...Although she would take "scary" as a compliment, too! So win, win! :-)

Anonymous said...

Oh my Kristy! You got me almost wettin' myself! I guess the future reflux marriage with Jackson and Sophie is in jeopardy now that Brock is in the picture! LOL! Girl, I can always count on your for a laugh!

~Nancy & Jackson

Courtney said...

Great Post!!!!!! I love the cut-out likeness of her, so cute. Can't wait to hear more hilarity from the halls of preschool!

Car said...

Hi Kristy,

Sophie is adorable and your postings are hilarious! What are you thinking of getting Sophie and her teacher for the holidays this year?

I have a resource that you may find helpful. As you may know, women are usually the primary buyers in the family, especially when it comes to gifts. America’s Foremost Gift Expert Robyn Spizman has created, an A to Z directory of gifts that makes shopping simple for busy moms everywhere! Designed to make gift giving a cinch, offers an easy-to-search, free to consumers, go-to-gift guide listing with detailed descriptions of gifts by categories, occasions, recipients and city. What Webster did for the dictionary, Spizman did for The Giftionary!

As a mother with more than 25 years of experience reporting on gift giving as a consumer advocate, Spizman dreamed up, where hard-working moms can find the perfect gift for their kids, husband, friends and in-laws. From edibles to eco-friendly gifts, has something for all of the important people on your list.

“Everyone wants a gift that’s unique, personal and memorable,” Spizman says. “The Giftionary brings consumers and gift makers together in one fun and easy-to-navigate place.”

For more information, visit To schedule an interview with founder Robyn Spizman or to feature as a resource on your blog, please contact me at or 770.953.2040.

Thank you,

About Robyn Spizman
Nationally known New York Times best-selling author and veteran media personality, Robyn Spizman is America’s foremost gift giving expert and the gift expert at She has appeared repeatedly on The Today Show and served for 30 years as the Super Shopper on television in Atlanta and Gift Guru featured on “The Giftionary Show” with Cindy & Ray on Star 94. For three decades, Robyn Spizman has reported on shopping and consumer topics, including the nation’s hottest gifts and products, for many of America's leading talk shows. Her appearances include NBC’s Today, MSNBC, CNN, The Discovery Channel, CNN Headline News, CNBC and numerous ABC, NBC, CBS and FOX stations across America. Visit or for more information.

Related Posts with Thumbnails